Yeah…

Okay.

Hold on—no, wait—

Don’t hold on.

I say I’m fine like it’s a password,

Type it in, hope it lets me through.

Everybody’s got a version of me,

None of them are true.

I scroll my life like it’s a highlight,

Skip the parts where I break down.

If I joke about it first,

You can’t tell me I’m not okay now.

I keep my feelings in airplane mode,

No signal, no reply.

If I don’t look too close at myself,

I almost feel alive.

Yeah right—

I’m doing great, don’t worry about me.

Yeah right—

I’m totally where I’m supposed to be.

Ctrl, Alt, Del my head tonight,

Something’s glitching every time I try.

If you’re still here, don’t let me go—

If you’re not, just lie.

I laugh too loud in the wrong places,

Say “I love you” like it’s a joke.

I don’t know if I want attention

Or just someone close.

My brain won’t shut up, it keeps remixing

Every word I didn’t say.

I replay moments like they’re sacred,

Then pretend they don’t mean a thing.

I keep saying I don’t care anymore,

But I check my phone like I do.

If indifference is freedom,

Why does it still hurt like you?

Yeah right—

I’m doing great, don’t worry about me.

Yeah right—

I’m totally where I’m supposed to be.

Ctrl, Alt, Del my head tonight,

Something’s broken every time I try.

If you’re still here, don’t let me go—

If you’re not, just lie.

Okay, okay—listen—

I don’t need forever, I don’t need God,

I just need you to sit here while my brain goes off.

You don’t have to fix me, don’t make it deep,

Just don’t disappear when I finally speak.

Stay.

Or don’t.

Just tell me which one it is.

Yeah right—

I say it like I don’t feel a thing.

Yeah right—

Like I’m immune to everything.

I keep hitting restart on my life,

Same errors, different night.

If you see me, say it slow—

I’m still here.

I hope.

If this crashes,

That’s on me.

But…

Thanks for staying through the loading screen.